This mother made six attempts to raise the alarm about her sick toddler. Doctors told her he’d be fine. They were fatally wrong

On the morning of 30 November 2022, Keri-Sue McManus sat down with her three-year-old son, Micah, to watch the TV series Daniel Tiger’s Neighborhood. 

She was sensitive to his mood because it wasn’t the first time Micah had visited the emergency room in recent weeks. In fact, it was the third time Keri-Sue had taken her toddler to hospital, and the sixth time that month she had contacted various doctors about his deterioration: he had a lack of appetite, weakness, fatigue and severe dizziness, and these symptoms were getting worse.

Each time, she was reassured he would get better. One medic even implied that their frequent visits to the hospital were giving her son anxiety. It was suggested the mother should think twice about taking him in again, for his own sake – hence the cartoon.

In the Daniel Tiger episode, the cub, nervously approaching his appointment, is told: “The hospital is a place where doctors and nurses work together to help you get better.” But that’s not the way it worked out for Micah, who died just hours after he arrived on this third visit, after a series of clinicians failed to take his condition seriously.

I’ve relived all those moments a thousand times. What if I’d gone to this doctor; what if I’d said it this way instead of that way

“Daniel goes to hospital and the doctors fix him and everybody’s so nice. And then he gets to go home,” Keri-Sue remembers of the cartoon. “It’s like a fairytale that we didn’t get to live out.”

Micah’s story casts light on how parents, especially mothers, are frequently patronised and dismissed by the medical profession. “I can’t think of any other way to describe it besides gaslighting,” Keri-Sue says when we speak. “It’s your own child, so you get a feeling or you notice something. You know your child’s normal state better than anybody else and you’re paying attention more than anybody else. I’ve relived all those moments a thousand times. What if I’d gone to this doctor; what if I’d said it this way instead of that way. But the reality is that they weren’t paying attention and doing their job.

“Part of my grief has been trying to wrap my head around how it all happened.”

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Source: The Guardian, 26 October 2024